Grief is simply a fact of life. If you love someone, then you are destined to experience grief. Fortunately, this simple truth has become more accepted and recognized. From the publication of “On Death and Dying” in 1969 by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, the subject has become much more openly discussed. It has become so common that National Grief Awareness Day hardly raises an eyebrow. This year, National Grief Awareness Day is August 31, and we invite you to consider some of the insights expressed on National Today’s website:
“Grief is one of the oldest and most enduring aspects of the human experience. If you haven’t yet experienced grief, it’s unfortunately likely to happen. The term ‘grief’ encompasses all of the emotions around a loss, and ‘mourning’ is defined as the external expression of the pain. ‘Bereavement’ is another commonly-used term for grief. Throughout human history, there have been many attempts to describe and heal grief, and they have changed significantly over the years.”
The organization then lists two facts and three myths about grief that are worth thinking about.
Fact: Grief often comes with secondary losses
While the trauma of losing a loved one is hard enough, those in mourning frequently must cope with a secondary associated loss, like loss of financial security or loss of housing.
Fact: Grief requires effort
‘Grief-work’ is the term often used to refer to a grief response — the physical and emotional toll of grief deeply affects the lives of those going through it, so it’s important to engage in self-care throughout.
Myth: Grief = Mourning
Though not widely known, it’s true that mourning and grief cannot be used interchangeably — grief is the internal pain associated with loss, while mourning is the external expression of that pain and it often facilitates grief.
Myth: Grief happens in clearly defined stages
While professionals have identified significant stages of grief that often occur, it is possible and even common for those working through grief to skip steps entirely, have more than one reaction at once, or move backward through steps.
Myth: Grief can be completely resolved
Sadly, many people who have experienced loss report that grief, in some form or another, continues for the rest of their lives. Like many other mental ailments, it can recur in varying levels of intensity for years.
Grieving is a complicated and deeply personal process. Realize that there is no right or wrong way to grieve. If you need to talk about your loss, please reach out to a professional or contact HOPE Connection. Being supported during your grieving can save your life.