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Grief Support Groups Serving West Los Angeles, Encino and Agoura Hills

Healing (Page 6)

“The Times They Are A Changin”

By Evelyn Pechter, Psy.D.

Bob Dylan was right — there are all kinds of changes that come. Layers upon layers of change.  Among those layers are welcome changes: for example, a new baby in the family, a new son or daughter-in-law. These changes can allow for a smile and fond memories. Then there are changes that are not so welcome. The ones that cause great pain and grief — the primary losses: the death of a spouse, or a parent or anyone, near or far. Then there are secondary losses: the lack of physically getting together with friends and family, the change of everyday routines, such as going to the market, and feeling fearful if someone gets closer than six feet, and a list that grows. 

Tend and Befriend with Mindful Self-Compassion

It’s raining outside.  I’m sitting inside listening to the rain and pondering the essence of Nature as I watch the raindrops and leaves falling. Nature is so beautiful… and restoring. The rain brings regrowth and soon the trees will be green again. How do we know that? Because we’ve seen it happen over and over, cycle after cycle.

Did You Really Just Say That?

You are grieving, upset, depressed, anxious, feeling alone and lost while finding yourself in a maze of people. Some of those people are family, good friends, co-workers, neighbors — the myriad of human beings who inhabit your world. You used to be able count on them to lift your spirits, trade a smile, give a caring word. Now you barely recognize your life and the people in it. Some are avoiding you as though you had a contagious disease. Even worse are those who speak in a language that cuts right to the bone of your despair. Perhaps you have been on the receiving end of these gems of insensitivity. Here are just a few that you may recognize:

The Story Of A Bear

If you’re a current member of a HOPE group or an alum, do you remember your orientation at your first meeting? Many members, even a few weeks after that first meeting, can’t remember a thing that was said. They remember how they felt — the overwhelming emotions that virtually prevented them from speaking, and — also very important — the kindness and compassion of the therapists and mentor who explained the process to come. But what was said? No.

Four Tips For Healthy Healing

Max Izenberg, founder of the newsletter “Suddenly65,” focuses on how a healthy lifestyle impacts peoples’ health and well being.  She has written two books and various articles on health and wellness and her book “Who Took My Chocolate Cake?” is dedicated to helping seniors maintain their health and zest for life as they move through the years.  You may find even more…

Acceptance? No Way! Well, Maybe?

Acceptance — what does that even mean? How does acceptance even happen?

Will acceptance show up? How will I know?

What if I don’t believe there is acceptance? 

There are so many questions about acceptance and no easy answers. Especially acceptance of the loss of a loved one. When someone so important in your life dies, acceptance seems confusing and unrealistic.

Turn! Turn! Turn!

I have been listening to versions of Turn! Turn! Turn! since Pete Seeger took the much quoted biblical passage from Ecclesiastes and made it into a song in the 1950s. In 1965 it became an international hit as recorded by the Byrds.

As a young woman, I felt the power of the song lyrics as I examined my life and looked toward the possibilities with so many years to come.

The Colors of Grief

Spring is finally here!  Winter felt like forever this year. Now, we’re watching the miracle of Nature as life slowly comes back to our landscapes that were changed by the harshness of Winter and natural disasters. The charred California mountains are now filled with beautiful colors of blue lupine, orange poppies and the golden mustard plant. Do you feel it? The colorful…

Enough Is Enough! Not Another Loss!

When a person experiences multiple deaths of loved ones within a short period of time, the pain can feel like too much to bear. Not only are you grieving for one loss, now there are two… for some, maybe more. As a result of multiple losses, your usual support system may be depleting. The people in your life may not understand the depth of your grief or be able to tolerate the intensity of it. You may feel a lack of connection with others, which may increase yours sense of isolation or loneliness.

What’s Happening? Am I Going Crazy?

What’s happening? I’m so spacey. I put the ice cream in the cupboard and the car keys in the freezer! I missed an appointment today! I’ve never done that before. Am I going crazy? Maybe I have Alzheimer’s! Oh my! I’m just not me anymore. What’s happening?

No worries, It’s your grief. You’re experiencing “Grief Fog.” Yes, it is a real thing! A mental fog and confusion are actually neurochemistry symptoms of extreme stress and grief. It is normal to be preoccupied, trying to make sense of the loss. All of these factors contribute to the fog of grief.