John Roedel is a poet and author of Hey God. Hey John.
His poetry readings on YouTube just might touch your heart and help to heal your grief. In the video below, he reads his poem, “Grief Is A Coral Reef.”
For more of Roedel’s poetry, see his website.
“How am I doing?” people ask.
Fine, I say
“I’m staying busy”
Doing many of the same things I’ve always done
Everything is the same… only different
We often hear a lament in the grief groups: “I can’t cry. I want to but I can’t. What’s wrong with me?”
It’s normal to feel numb when you’re grieving. It does not mean that something is wrong with you. Emotional numbness can occur when your body goes through the shock of loss. It’s the body’s natural anesthetic to help you through the transition from the reality of the suddenness of death to a new reality. It’s difficult to feel… and difficult to accept the lack of feelings. But feelings will return in time. Some people cry on the inside. Others can’t stop crying for a while. Grieving is a strikingly individual experience.
The following poem aptly describes the despair and confusion of having no tears.
Skim through any adult education bulletin and you will see every kind of subject imaginable with a couple exceptions. It is next to impossible to find a listing for a course in Improvisation. This is not a big surprise. Unless you are an actor, you probably would flee from a class where you are in the spotlight without a clue of what will be happening or how you are supposed to respond.
I was scared as I entered the parlor
only a child of eight.
A house call with mom for the last visit
with my forever-gone uncle
my dear Uncle Nate.
The morning comes and you look for a reason to get out of bed.
You want to linger for hours but force yourself to rise and take a mini step to join the day.
That is courage.
The toothbrush you hold feels like a heavy hammer but you manage to brush your teeth, wash your face, fix your hair.
That is determination.
By Lynne Goldklang
Grief is an intense missing, longing, wanting, yearning for what can never be.
Grief is loss so profound that relief is impossible, undesirable — an insult to love lost.
Grief is forever and healing an illusion of optimistic folly.
Grief is the vulture that attacks without mercy.
By Michael Arvanitis
I don’t like this. I am Lonely
And I don’t know what else to do.
Being isolated and by myself
Brings back memories of my last months with You.
By Lynn Ungar, Unitarian Minister What if you thought of itas the Jews consider the Sabbath—the most sacred of times?Cease from travel.Cease from buying and selling.Give up, just for now, on trying to make the worlddifferent than it is. Sing. Pray. Touch only thoseto whom you commit your life.Center down. And when your body has become still,reach out with your heart.Know that we are…
The time will come when, with elation you will greet yourself arriving at your own door, in your own mirror and each will smile at the other’s welcome, and say, sit here. Eat. You will love again the stranger who was your self. Give wine. Give bread. Give back your heart to itself, to the stranger who has loved you all your…