(818) 788-HOPE (4673)
Grief Support Groups Serving West Los Angeles, Encino and Agoura Hills

First Person (Page 2)

A Mother’s Loss And Grief

Barbara Bergstein has worked with families of disabled children for over 30 years. She has served as a board member of the Autism Society of Los Angeles and spoken to parent groups about the rights of children with disabilities. Barbara is also a practicing attorney specializing in estate planning for individuals with special needs. She is frequently consulted by other law firms on the uses of Special Needs Trusts to protect government benefits for disabled children and adults. Barbara can be reached at her website.

I have suffered many losses. My parents died within a year of each other, first my father then my mother. The year after my mother died, my brother died of lung cancer at age 63. I am now an orphan and the sole surviving member of my family of four. 

The Missing Peace: When You Can’t Say Goodbye

My husband was lost at sea. Sailing around the world was his lifelong dream. He bought the boat, retired, spent years preparing for the journey and set a date. I supported his dream but didn’t want to go with him. We both agreed that I would meet him at various ports, sharing in the experience that way. After six months cruising the Sea of Cortez (where I joined him several times) he took off solo for the South Pacific. He never completed his passage between Mexico and the Marquesas. Three weeks into his five-week crossing, he disappeared in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, hundreds of miles from any landmass in one of the most remote places on earth for search and rescue. I never got to say goodbye.

Shoulder Taps

Do you ever get an intuitive feeling, a little voice in your head, that tells you to do something, say something, that is completely out of your comfort zone? Have you ever acted on that feeling? Maybe you should, says Bill Hart, in this short but compelling video — Shoulder Taps.

One Thing You Need To Do Today

Author and former monk Jay Shetty has a message for those living alone during the COVID-19 pandemic. Currently leading a 20-day, live meditation series on Instagram, he says we should strive to do one thing each day that brings us joy — and that despite social distancing, we can still nurture essential human connections. In this short PBS video, Shetty offers his…

The Power of Hope

We always hear feedback from our members and graduates of our programs about how positively Hope Connection has affected their lives. I offer, at this time, my own personal perspective of how Hope Connection has affected mine from a facilitator’s point of view.

Resiliency: 3 Ways To Cope With Tragedy And Loss

Lucy Hone is a codirector at the New Zealand Institute of Wellbeing & Resilience and a research associate at AUT University in Auckland. She is also the author of the book Resilient Grieving.

I’d like to start by asking you some questions.

Have you ever lost someone you loved? Had your heart broken? Struggled through an acrimonious divorce or been the victim of infidelity?

Have you ever lived through a natural disaster? Been bullied? Or made redundant from a job?

Ever had a miscarriage or an abortion, or struggled through infertility?

Finally, have you or anyone you loved had to cope with mental illness, dementia, some form of physical impairment, or suicide?

Chances are, you answered “yes” to one or more of these questions, and that’s true for most people. Adversity doesn’t discriminate.

If you are alive, you are going to have to deal with some tough times.

Thank You, HOPE Connection

In a time of spousal loss, we can seek solace from friends and family, but we also need to find a healing circle of people with whom we can speak openly without having the words catch in our throats. We need to share our grief with others going through similar feelings. 

Together we face our loss as part of a loving, accepting community — sharing, laughing, crying, recalling moments of lost love.

HOPE CONNECTION is the place to find that “beloved” circle.

Seymour Rimer — “Sy”


Gratitude – Essential To Healing

If you’re grieving the death of your spouse, it may sometimes feel as though you’ll never heal. But as the days and weeks and months and, yes, even years go by, healing does occur. One essential part of the healing process is gratitude. In the early days of your grief, gratitude might also seem like an emotion you’ll never experience again. If you make a practice of gratitude, though — expressing it even if you do not wholeheartedly feel it — you may just find that gratitude helps you heal.

My Journey of Hope

At HOPE Connection, we have a tradition that we encourage every group member to participate in. It is the simple act of saying goodbye to other group members and the group therapist when a member moves from one group to the next. We continue that tradition when a member graduates from Group Five. The following is a poem that Lynne Goldklang wrote and then read to the entire HOPE Connection community as she said goodbye.

Turn! Turn! Turn!

I have been listening to versions of Turn! Turn! Turn! since Pete Seeger took the much quoted biblical passage from Ecclesiastes and made it into a song in the 1950s. In 1965 it became an international hit as recorded by the Byrds.

As a young woman, I felt the power of the song lyrics as I examined my life and looked toward the possibilities with so many years to come.